I said this to myself for most of a year: “Why bother dressing up? Nobody sees me anyway.” Then one morning I put on a wrap top instead of the stained tee, for no reason, and my eldest said I looked like a mummy from the telly. I stood up straighter for the rest of the day. That was when I understood that getting dressed on purpose was a small way of looking after the person who was looking after everyone else.

This is the mini guide to doing that across a whole day of feeding: what to wear for every day, for the sofa, for the christening, for the night, plus the accessories that actually do a job and the bra under all of it. Every outfit here opens with one hand. Most of it is probably in your closet already.

1. Every day: the formula that takes four minutes

A clip-down nursing tank under a top that opens or lifts, a bottom with a soft waist that sits above a scar, and a shoe you can walk a pram in. That is the whole everyday formula. The top can be a V-neck, a button-down worn open, a wrap, or a loose crew lifted from the hem; the bottom can be jeans in this month’s size, joggers, a pull-on midi or soft shorts.

For the sporty version: joggers, the tank, a half-zip and sneakers. For summer: linen shorts, the tank, a shirt open over it and sandals. Ten outfits built around a nursing tank is the formula pictured ten ways.

2. Loungewear that is dressed enough for the door

The first weeks are lived in loungewear, and the trick is loungewear that does not embarrass you when the health visitor knocks. Jersey joggers with a drawstring below the scar, a soft wide trouser, a relaxed tee or a wrap top in a kind colour, a fine cardigan, a button-front lounge dress, slides. Soft below the waist, open above it, and one colour near the face that is not grey.

Ten nursing-friendly loungewear pieces is the free list and the Soft Landing Capsule is twenty-five of those outfits laid out.

3. Dresses for the occasions

The wedding, the christening, the first dinner out. A dress that opens at the front is the whole answer: a wrap in a jersey or crepe, a button-front shirt dress, or a V-neck deep enough to pull aside over the tank. A midi or maxi length means you can sit and feed without thinking about your knees, and a print on a dark ground hides a mark better than anything plain.

Breastfeeding-friendly wedding guest dresses goes through the shapes by season.

From the capsules

The Year Round Capsule

Two hundred nursing-friendly outfits from fifty-six pieces, fifty for every season, laid out and then worn. $29 once, yours to keep.

See the capsule →

4. What to sleep in

Night is where the wrong outfit costs the most. A wireless sleep bra that holds a pad, a button-front pyjama top or a clip tank in mid-weight cotton, soft bottoms, and nothing that comes over your head in the dark. A long button-front nightdress is the one-piece version. A fine cardigan on the chair for the three o’clock feed in winter.

Dark colours, so the mark in the morning is the washing machine’s problem and not yours.

5. The accessories that do a job

A large soft scarf, which is the feeding cover on the bench, the blanket in the car and the colour near your face. A crossbody bag, because both hands are taken. Earrings that do not dangle where a small hand can reach. Flat shoes you can step into. That is the list; everything else is for next year. Ten outfits built around a scarf shows the first one doing its three jobs.

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6. The bra under all of it

Two wireless nursing bras you can sleep in for the first weeks, then one with more structure for the days out. Clips that open with one hand, a band that does not dig, cups with room for a pad. Try them on at the end of the day, when you are fullest, and buy the second only after a week in the first. A bra that fits is the difference between a top that hangs right and a top you keep tugging at.

Six parts of the day, one rule under all of them: it opens with one hand. The dressing-up my eldest noticed was not a dress. It was a wrap top instead of the stained tee, and it changed how I stood. Pouring everything into the babies is the job; a four-minute outfit is how you keep a little back for yourself without taking anything from them.

If you want the outfits already laid out so you can copy them onto your own rail, the Year Round Capsule is two hundred of them across the seasons, every one opening, with three pictures of you in them on the house. If you would rather someone who knows your closet picked each morning, that is Anah inside the Atelier. And First Look will tell you, free, which colour near your face is the kind one.

Somebody does see you. The focus is on you, mama.